Dont Procarstinate Anymore

I have been in a habit of procrastinating anything and everything for a long time now. I procrastinate eating, sleeping, studying, working, blogging, practicing...or simply anything that requires my urgent attention. But this is the end of all the procrastination.

I hereby declare that from this moment onwards, i kill procrastination gene in me. Here We Go :)

Dont say..All the Best..PLEASE!!!

I am sick of listening to "All the Best" "All the Best" "Best of Luck" "Good Luck" and the likes. Well the reason being that i have been getting these wishes for so long now that i just want to hear that sweet "Congratulations" instead of the boring Best Wishes.

Wishing someone best of luck isn't that bad, but when you keep listening to it all the time, it reminds you of the failures and tells you there is still something to be done. On the other hand, congratulations comes through as something that makes you feel good and instills the success that you have achieved in its entirety.

I firmly believe that its time i hear Congrats and not best of luck. Will keep u fellas posted..Cya :)

Back to Life

Back to Life is a software i used a couple of months ago to recover some files from a friends dead hard drive :) And this is the title i give to this post as talking to Samar in the morning made me realize i need to keep posting my ideas.

The lame reason that i have for being away from blogs is that i have been busy with interns. Still no excuses. Now am back to life and here goes the brief of whats been happenning over the last 4 months.

I have got over my relationship blues (Thanks a lot to Amit who stayed with me mostof the times and kept me going with his pranks, jokes and just plain intelligent talk). I joined a shitty summer job at a travel company and left it in a hurry :)

I even went to Goa (I ll post the pics) on a short 2 day trip. It was awesome. Then i MS and worked on PT. Working at MS really changed my perspective about things. I have enjoyed my time here, but drawing to a close now with last 10 days to go. I bought a new camera (a brand new Nikon L19) with the money i earned from my summer job.

This is more or less what happenned over the last few months. Looking forward, i have grand plans for the next 3-4 months which i hope shall work out fine. Will definitely keep you all updated, do check www.siddharthsingh.in and blog.siddharthsingh.in for more. Talk to you soon. tc. Cheers :)

Something very random...

They rallied round the family with pocket full of shells....Hey i am not supposed to be writing a blog today, but to study for my exam tomorrow :) but here i am blogging my way to freedom :) Why do i blog? Cuz i feel liberated and free.

A while ago i read a report that mentioned about Al Quaeda having warned of many more Nov 26ths to India. Why did they warn us? Who is us? Its us :) its the common man. One whose children have gone away in search of a great career, middle class India who lives by their aspirations and keep fighting to earn their daily bread and butter day in and day out. This is not a Jihad...Its a war against u and I. Its a war against humanity. Another article i read quoted Mr.PC, our Home minister. According to minister, we are ready for Al Quaeda...Are we?? really??? I dont think so. Anyone can walk around in this free country and do whatever they want to do. No sir we are not ready and we wont be ready till a certain Mr Thackrey stop enticing his followers to beat up poor and weak from other states. We wont be ready till hatred between verious communities continue to breed. We wont be safe till we cant trust our neighbours.We wont be ready till we are self initiated and motivated, independent in the true sense from all prejudices. we will be ready when and only when we realize the power of one.

As far as i am concerned, am just limping through :( Its all tattooed Black :( Waiting for that flower to bloom again. Will be back with more. Cya :)

The addiction of touch

Being with someone. Being close to someone (a certain someone).........thts what i want :)

Have u ever got lost in someone s eyes? 

It had been hardly 10 seconds since i looked into her beautiful brown eyes when the urge to kiss her now so familiar soft lips was owerpowering me and i had to fight back with all my strength of self-constraint and look away, making sure i dont spoil whatever i was left with.

Are you in love with me?" She asked. I'm sure I saw a tear in her eye when I looked over. She turned her head so I  couldn't see it though.

"I don't know. I'm not sure what it would feel like. I know I like you very much. And I know I don't look forward to a life without you. I don't want you to leave. I know I've never felt this way about anyone before. If this isn't love, I can't wait to fall in love because it must be incredible." I said in a rare moment of clarity and poetry.

And a few moments later, under a star-lit sky i proposed her.

We never realize when things get out of hand, when the desperation to get the one you love swallows you and every sane thought turns into a lethal,binding and hopeless insanity. There have been occasions in the last few days when i have felt numb and emotionless. The numbness arose out of the need to shield my soul against the storm of insanity which keeps pushing me into the darkness, day in and day out.

Love is a weird and wonderful thing.Sometimes we choose to make it good or bad.Probably its not even our choice but its the time that makes us do things we dont ever want to do. Sometimes i feel suffocated and experience terrible sorrow.In these times the general feeling is that of desperation and it makes me want to be touched and  loved, cuddled and be close to someone. It gets worse when you get used to the feeling and lose it, all of a sudden. 

Again this gives you two options- Hate yourself/her and move into darkness OR fight it and get accustomed to change,  start smiling again and move on. I chose the second path but am addicted to her touch now :( Am just walking in the  wilderness with only the belief that in the end things work out the way they have to. Do i miss her?? Upto you to decide :) 

Cya

Da Cheat that I am

Here I would like to quote lines from the song Better Man by my favorite band Pearl Jam,

Waitin, watchin the clock, its four oclock, its got to stop
Tell him, take no more, she practices her speech
As he opens the door, she rolls over...
Pretends to sleep as he looks her over
She lies and says shes in love with him, cant find a better man...
She dreams in color, she dreams in red, cant find a better man...
Cant find a better man (2x)
Ohh...Talkin to herself, theres no one else who needs to know...
She tells herself, oh...
Memories back when she was bold and strong
And waiting for the world to come along...
Swears she knew it, now she swears hes gone
She lies and says shes in love with him, cant find a better man...
She dreams in color, she dreams in red, cant find a better man...
She lies and says she still loves him, cant find a better man...
She dreams in color, she dreams in red, cant find a better man...
Cant find a better man (2x)
Yeah...
..............Well I had my Convocation the past weekend and it was among my happiest moments ever. But, you know the feeling of lull after a storm, the feeling that sucks you into the empty darkness called loneliness. Till i was with friends, i was full of energy and was having a blast. Now, its all over and here i am on this lonely lap of the race called life. Over the past few days i have realized all of us cheat ourselves( at least i do), more often than is necessary. Whenever we make assumptions how others are going to behave, all we are doing is to tell a wishful lie to ourselves.
There is a certain law of attraction which i would like to quote here...If someone moves away from someone, they move closer to someone else"....But am not sure if the reverse is also true. Certain someone has moved away from and got closer to some others, but here i am alone with no one moving closer to me...FACTS OF LIFE :).......Now am off to listen to another Pearl Jam Song..Black....Here is my favorite line from that song....

I know someday you'll have a beautiful life
I know you'll be a sun
In somebody else's sky
But why
Why
Why can't it be
Why can't it be mine ...

I leave you with that but promise to bring some happier thoughts next time around, even though i ll have to cheat myself for that, BUT THE LIE IS A NECESSARY EVIL, AIN'T IT. Cya :)

The Week that was

Ah MRA camp seems like its been ages,but here i am in a completely opposite mood compared to the one i had when i returned from MRA. Now as far as the learnings from MRA goes, the one thing i learned was to manage my relationships in life better. And that is something thats gone completely haywire in THE WEEK THAT WAS.

The week started off good as i got to meet a close friend from graduation who had come to give her exam.Being around all my close mates brought back the memories from the past.It was good while it lasted :) But i got a sour Christmas gift or maybe just maybe it was a blessing in disguise.Why choke something beautiful by pulling it close when you can admire it from a distance :) Here i remember a line i heard from a very special friend.....Promise only when you can keep it...Sometimes in life we make mistakes of saying things when we cannot handle it properly....Then why do we do such a thing???I believe its all about evaluating your personal abilities and state of mind.I am usually good at evaluating myself but on this occasion the emotions got better of me.Maybe i should have waited for another month which would have made sure i am back to normal and learnt from my past mistakes.Well life does not provide for any Ifs and buts.

My biggest flaw is that i am the best planner and the worst implementor. This has been the story of my life and being lost just doesnt help the cause.I am just not able to gauge the abstract flow around me.I now realize what i never understood my special friend kept saying that i dont realize most of the things, but i was lost :( No need to make excuses though.I have learned my lesson and will make sure nothing untoward happens hereon. Meanwhile i am keeping my fingers crossed about new years eve.All i can say is god sees the truth but waits.Cya :)