I am Lost

Dont Procarstinate Anymore

2009-12-27T02:58:00.000-08:00

I have been in a habit of procrastinating anything and everything for a long time now. I procrastinate eating, sleeping, studying, working, blogging, practicing...or simply anything that requires my urgent attention. But this is the end of all the procrastination.

I hereby declare that from this moment onwards, i kill procrastination gene in me. Here We Go :)

Dont say..All the Best..PLEASE!!!

2009-12-26T00:40:00.000-08:00

I am sick of listening to "All the Best" "All the Best" "Best of Luck" "Good Luck" and the likes. Well the reason being that i have been getting these wishes for so long now that i just want to hear that sweet "Congratulations" instead of the boring Best Wishes.

Wishing someone best of luck isn't that bad, but when you keep listening to it all the time, it reminds you of the failures and tells you there is still something to be done. On the other hand, congratulations comes through as something that makes you feel good and instills the success that you have achieved in its entirety.

I firmly believe that its time i hear Congrats and not best of luck. Will keep u fellas posted..Cya :)

Back to Life

2009-07-09T03:31:00.000-07:00

Back to Life is a software i used a couple of months ago to recover some files from a friends dead hard drive :) And this is the title i give to this post as talking to Samar in the morning made me realize i need to keep posting my ideas.

The lame reason that i have for being away from blogs is that i have been busy with interns. Still no excuses. Now am back to life and here goes the brief of whats been happenning over the last 4 months.

I have got over my relationship blues (Thanks a lot to Amit who stayed with me mostof the times and kept me going with his pranks, jokes and just plain intelligent talk). I joined a shitty summer job at a travel company and left it in a hurry :)

I even went to Goa (I ll post the pics) on a short 2 day trip. It was awesome. Then i MS and worked on PT. Working at MS really changed my perspective about things. I have enjoyed my time here, but drawing to a close now with last 10 days to go. I bought a new camera (a brand new Nikon L19) with the money i earned from my summer job.

This is more or less what happenned over the last few months. Looking forward, i have grand plans for the next 3-4 months which i hope shall work out fine. Will definitely keep you all updated, do check www.siddharthsingh.in and blog.siddharthsingh.in for more. Talk to you soon. tc. Cheers :)

Something very random...

2009-02-11T08:37:00.000-08:00

They rallied round the family with pocket full of shells....Hey i am not supposed to be writing a blog today, but to study for my exam tomorrow :) but here i am blogging my way to freedom :) Why do i blog? Cuz i feel liberated and free.

A while ago i read a report that mentioned about Al Quaeda having warned of many more Nov 26ths to India. Why did they warn us? Who is us? Its us :) its the common man. One whose children have gone away in search of a great career, middle class India who lives by their aspirations and keep fighting to earn their daily bread and butter day in and day out. This is not a Jihad...Its a war against u and I. Its a war against humanity. Another article i read quoted Mr.PC, our Home minister. According to minister, we are ready for Al Quaeda...Are we?? really??? I dont think so. Anyone can walk around in this free country and do whatever they want to do. No sir we are not ready and we wont be ready till a certain Mr Thackrey stop enticing his followers to beat up poor and weak from other states. We wont be ready till hatred between verious communities continue to breed. We wont be safe till we cant trust our neighbours.We wont be ready till we are self initiated and motivated, independent in the true sense from all prejudices. we will be ready when and only when we realize the power of one.

As far as i am concerned, am just limping through :( Its all tattooed Black :( Waiting for that flower to bloom again. Will be back with more. Cya :)

The addiction of touch

2009-02-09T02:25:00.000-08:00

Being with someone. Being close to someone (a certain someone).........thts what i want :)

Have u ever got lost in someone s eyes?

It had been hardly 10 seconds since i looked into her beautiful brown eyes when the urge to kiss her now so familiar soft lips was owerpowering me and i had to fight back with all my strength of self-constraint and look away, making sure i dont spoil whatever i was left with.

Are you in love with me?" She asked. I'm sure I saw a tear in her eye when I looked over. She turned her head so I couldn't see it though.

"I don't know. I'm not sure what it would feel like. I know I like you very much. And I know I don't look forward to a life without you. I don't want you to leave. I know I've never felt this way about anyone before. If this isn't love, I can't wait to fall in love because it must be incredible." I said in a rare moment of clarity and poetry.

And a few moments later, under a star-lit sky i proposed her.

We never realize when things get out of hand, when the desperation to get the one you love swallows you and every sane thought turns into a lethal,binding and hopeless insanity. There have been occasions in the last few days when i have felt numb and emotionless. The numbness arose out of the need to shield my soul against the storm of insanity which keeps pushing me into the darkness, day in and day out.

Love is a weird and wonderful thing.Sometimes we choose to make it good or bad.Probably its not even our choice but its the time that makes us do things we dont ever want to do. Sometimes i feel suffocated and experience terrible sorrow.In these times the general feeling is that of desperation and it makes me want to be touched and loved, cuddled and be close to someone. It gets worse when you get used to the feeling and lose it, all of a sudden.

Again this gives you two options- Hate yourself/her and move into darkness OR fight it and get accustomed to change, start smiling again and move on. I chose the second path but am addicted to her touch now :( Am just walking in the wilderness with only the belief that in the end things work out the way they have to. Do i miss her?? Upto you to decide :)

Cya

Da Cheat that I am

2009-01-06T08:01:00.000-08:00

Here I would like to quote lines from the song Better Man by my favorite band Pearl Jam,

Waitin, watchin the clock, its four oclock, its got to stop
Tell him, take no more, she practices her speech
As he opens the door, she rolls over...
Pretends to sleep as he looks her over
She lies and says shes in love with him, cant find a better man...
She dreams in color, she dreams in red, cant find a better man...
Cant find a better man (2x)
Ohh...Talkin to herself, theres no one else who needs to know...
She tells herself, oh...
Memories back when she was bold and strong
And waiting for the world to come along...
Swears she knew it, now she swears hes gone
She lies and says shes in love with him, cant find a better man...
She dreams in color, she dreams in red, cant find a better man...
She lies and says she still loves him, cant find a better man...
She dreams in color, she dreams in red, cant find a better man...
Cant find a better man (2x)
Yeah...
..............Well I had my Convocation the past weekend and it was among my happiest moments ever. But, you know the feeling of lull after a storm, the feeling that sucks you into the empty darkness called loneliness. Till i was with friends, i was full of energy and was having a blast. Now, its all over and here i am on this lonely lap of the race called life. Over the past few days i have realized all of us cheat ourselves( at least i do), more often than is necessary. Whenever we make assumptions how others are going to behave, all we are doing is to tell a wishful lie to ourselves.
There is a certain law of attraction which i would like to quote here...If someone moves away from someone, they move closer to someone else"....But am not sure if the reverse is also true. Certain someone has moved away from and got closer to some others, but here i am alone with no one moving closer to me...FACTS OF LIFE :).......Now am off to listen to another Pearl Jam Song..Black....Here is my favorite line from that song....

I know someday you'll have a beautiful life
I know you'll be a sun
In somebody else's sky
But why
Why
Why can't it be
Why can't it be mine ...

I leave you with that but promise to bring some happier thoughts next time around, even though i ll have to cheat myself for that, BUT THE LIE IS A NECESSARY EVIL, AIN'T IT. Cya :)

The Week that was

2008-12-29T07:16:00.000-08:00

Ah MRA camp seems like its been ages,but here i am in a completely opposite mood compared to the one i had when i returned from MRA. Now as far as the learnings from MRA goes, the one thing i learned was to manage my relationships in life better. And that is something thats gone completely haywire in THE WEEK THAT WAS.

The week started off good as i got to meet a close friend from graduation who had come to give her exam.Being around all my close mates brought back the memories from the past.It was good while it lasted :) But i got a sour Christmas gift or maybe just maybe it was a blessing in disguise.Why choke something beautiful by pulling it close when you can admire it from a distance :) Here i remember a line i heard from a very special friend.....Promise only when you can keep it...Sometimes in life we make mistakes of saying things when we cannot handle it properly....Then why do we do such a thing???I believe its all about evaluating your personal abilities and state of mind.I am usually good at evaluating myself but on this occasion the emotions got better of me.Maybe i should have waited for another month which would have made sure i am back to normal and learnt from my past mistakes.Well life does not provide for any Ifs and buts.

My biggest flaw is that i am the best planner and the worst implementor. This has been the story of my life and being lost just doesnt help the cause.I am just not able to gauge the abstract flow around me.I now realize what i never understood my special friend kept saying that i dont realize most of the things, but i was lost :( No need to make excuses though.I have learned my lesson and will make sure nothing untoward happens hereon. Meanwhile i am keeping my fingers crossed about new years eve.All i can say is god sees the truth but waits.Cya :)

Being Lost

2008-12-09T03:11:00.000-08:00

One of my favorite fantasies has been to get lost somewhere in this big wide beautiful world.A place where no one can reach or disturb you.Well folks i did manage to satisfy my whims last month when i went on a long drive to Diveagarh,an isolated beach some 100 miles from pune.It was a trip in which i truly felt the feeling of being lost in the entirety.
How can you determine whether you are actually lost? Its a very simple test actually.Do the people living with you ever complain that you tend to ignore what they say and on the contrary you feel when did that happen.Well it happens to me all the time and i dont have a clue to it :) When i did a brief analysis of this fact,i realized that i dont ignore people,but am usually so lost that i dont even hear what they have to say.Now there is a certain part of my mind that is suggesting that i have i have become like a machine running a single process and Grass is responsible for all these malfunctions.The major portion still does not agree so it continues to be a theory of a lost mind.
Tomorrow i am going off to the MRA camp and hope i do get morally rehabilitated to something/someone functioning in a much better fashion.Will be back by weekend with the tales of the camp.Cya :)

Whats the topic BTW??

2008-11-21T00:04:00.000-08:00

Hello everybody...A friend of mine asked me why have i stopped posting blogs...i assure you i havent deserted blogsphere and the reason for not posting anything for a while is that nothing of real importance came up..well thats wrong actually..u know na i am kinda lazy :) Anyways i am sorry and promise to post regularly from now on.The current post does demand for a bulletin of stuffs that happenned over the last few months..

Here it goes...
1.) MBA started off well with me doing exceedingly well and gaining a lot of knowledge about things the way they are in the current set up of my class and college.
2.) Semester started off and brought back the bad habit of sleeping in class :) Its highly enjoyable and every man or woman must try it :)
3.) Made some very good friends and some not so good :)
4.) College fest..techie Kaun was a success...thanks largely to one MC and the 5 OCs...and off course all those who contributed heavily in actually making sure the two day event was glitch free.
5.) Symbi Olympics came and went...My team roared into second round of cricket and limped out there....:(
6.) ERM...i missed AARAMBH...it has to be the most awesome day :) My first stage performance in MBA :)
7.) Joined Decibels..my college band and started jamming regularly.
8.) Continued with the bad habit of leaving things to be finished at the 12th hour and thus putting my efficiency under heavy stress testing :)
9.) Making a very special friend :>)
10.) Going through the motions of giving the exams.
11.) Participating in a geeky competition with a friend of mine only to find ourselves doing better than many belonging to top colleges and worse than some others...Lessons learnt..Mistakes shall not be repeated next time :)
12.) Back to practicing for Neev :) May we win :)

Now that most of the headlining events are outta way, i take a bow and promise to be regular in my posts from now on. Thanks for all ur support..:-)

This is MBA baby!!!

2008-06-10T22:31:00.000-07:00

Hello dear reader..hope u'll are going great guns.I joined my MBA course last week and have adjusted quite well already.Have made some new friens also.But, the best thing that has happenned is that i have managed to cut down heavily on my expenses. The point is, when you are actively involvedin constructive activities then you wont hav anytime to indulge into useless activities and your mind is also free of any kind of negativism.enough of philosophy i guess... moving onto the situation of my college, well everything is all fine.Gotta tell you one thing though, college is full of politicians amd one needs to watch every step as they set out to conquer the world with an MBA degree cuz the path to achieve this is not a cake walk anyways...Chalo cya later..got to attend a class now :)

Control

2008-05-19T05:22:00.000-07:00

Its been ages since i last posted...well sorry for that.To all who wanna know the reason behind it, i have been homesick,literally. Ever since i came back home, i have been suffering from one illnes or the other.Now it seems i am okay so here i am discussing something new today.Something thats really been on my mind in the near past.Especially since i have taken up occult studies,the topic of our present discussion keeps coming through as one of importance.
What does control mean??Why does a person want control??How does he retain control??

Control according to me is something that highlights the need for a human being to dominate a situation as he/she feels desirable.So whats wrong with that??Nothing really....but when the domain of control is our day to day lifestyle and relationships, its something thats kinda sick and bothering.A normal human being likes to stay in control of his emotions and the situations that affect you.But, in order to control the situation man becomes so used to it that he becomes a control freak and gets used to manipulating situations at the cost of other fellow beings.Naah..no one would want to control their loved ones...this is exactly what i used to feel,but thanks to the people around me....i am wide awake now.I have over the years grown enough to realize what a certain action of one means.If its not control what else can you owe the following situations to.....A boyfriend asking his girlfriend not to talk to certain someone....A girlfriend asking her boy to do her bidding or just fuck off.....A child asking his mum for a new video game console or he wont go to school.
What all these situations show is that control has been built into us since our birth.We need control and dominance to survive as much as we need air.If we lose a bit of control,we feel stressed.Now its time that i reveal one of the best kept secrets of occultists....Yoga and meditation is not for calming you or bringing you closer to god.Its just to recharge your "control battries".After a session of meditation we feel better cuz the control is back.
Lets deviate a bit and have a look at stress.A person feels stressed when things are not going the way he wants or if lots of things are being expected or demanded of him by a boss,mom,dad,siblings,lovers,friends etc.In all these situations we are losing control.Thus, in scientific terms stress is directly proportional to loss of control.So to get over this stress we try and get the control back and the fastest way to it is through meditation.
Occultists have practised meditation through the history of mankind so as to strengthen their aura. This aura helps them to control their loacle as well as the elements of life.This particular phenomenon has been identified and is being heavily used by people to reduce stress in the cut-throat competition in the todays corporate structure.
There are always two paths to follow...Good or Evil....If we use control till we are managing ourselves and not adversely destroying someone elses happiness,its all cool.But this is not the situation generally,as people keep manipulating others for their own benefit.Its not the end of the world though,cuz this is the era of "HOMO DEITUS" and if God like humans do not understand their responsiblities,superior gods would make them understand sooner or later.I wanna say a lot of things today cuz frankly i am seriously pissed at the happennings in and around me where people are just breaking all the rules and ethics of humanity to gain control.Think about all this, i ll be back soon wid more.

p.s. Read more about occultism and homo deitus :)..Cheers

Exams

2008-04-19T21:43:00.000-07:00

The thing about exams is that the nerds love it and the rest despise it. In my college, most of the students depend heavily on the luck factor to pass the exams. Luck not for getting an easy paper, but for getting a lenient examiner and someone sitting around them who knows all the answers.
I am a lazy student who hates to study much and usually relies on his intelligence and god's divine interruption to see him through.Another reason why i dont study properly for my exams is cuz most of the times exams come in package deals.If my internal exams were help during the Australian tour, my externals are clubbed with the IPL. Whats my fault if these organizers dont care 'for innocent children like me....'
When i was a kid, i read somewhere.."if you are not preparing to succeed, you are preparing to fail." Whenever i am wasting my time over some stupid thing, i remember this phrase and say to myself..."at least i m preparing for something" lol(:-)...
But dear reader this my final exam of graduation so i cant expect to rely on anything other than sheer hard work to see me through.So i ll leave you alone for a couple of weeks.Things do seem to be on the up in my life....Icing on the cake for this good period of my life would be if i ace my exams and by next sunday have a good job to boast of as well.Wish me luck...:-)

Really Lost

2008-03-07T12:22:00.000-08:00

Helo ppl long time no see.....Well ma mistake i've been away from blogsphere for the last couple of weeks,i.e ever since the euphoria of exams took over.Lets stop this bullshit and get down to what i want to discuss.
Right now i am going through some king of identity crisis and i dont know where am i headed.The problem is that soo many things are bothering me that i can hardly prioritize.Also the problem of indecision has come back to haunt me all over again. jobs or studies? marketing or finance or IT? Rhythm guitarist or bassist? Metal or classical rock? friends or lovers?? Life always comes to a full circle and makes us feel inadequate about everything. I read somewhere, "Right now your life is exactly what you want it to be." Initially i did not endorse this statement but now the meaning has started to sink in. How else can you explain my negligent attitude towards studies leading to a couple of backlogs in last semester.I got exactly what i wanted.So basically i need to start working hard if i want to set things right in my life.I shall be busy, very busy for the next couple of months so may not post anything new. Come back towards the end of April for more insights into my mind.Till then adios :-)

N.M.A.P

2008-02-19T10:33:00.000-08:00

Woooh...i am back from Bombay and nothing can compare the amazing feeling i have right now.As far as title of this blog goes,it means, No More Adventures Please (N.M.A.P).You must be wondering what exactly happened on my Bombay trip.Lots of things actually.
I ll start with the train journey from pune to bombay. I took a ticket for second class and guessed it shall suffice for a reserved seat only to be proved wrong by the TT. Luckily though, the TT was kind enough to provide me and my friend with a seat at a nominal additional price of 30 rupees. Now the thing is our luck seemed to desert us here.
We experienced Mumbai local's rush hour first hand plus the delays cuz of some freak accident. After reaching our destination we searched for an hour,but sadly couldn't find a decent hotel. One place we went to was a 2 room shady apartment managed by a lady who seemed more like a pimp than a hotel manager. And next thing you know we were running out of that place at break neck speeds.
After trying every maneuver in the book to find a place to spend the night, we finally called our trusted senior "joy" who stayed 30 mins away and he was kind enough to invite us to his place. Joy's apartment was small but nice and as soon as i lay down,i dozed off only to be awakened by joy's phone alarm. It was 5 in the morning,time when life of a working guy starts in mumbai. After getting ready we rushed to our exam center. As far as the exam is concerned it went well. The real show started after exam.
The thing about Indian police that puzzles me the most is they trouble harmless people while turning a blind eye to scoundrels and criminals. This time they decided to trouble me and my friend. As we were enquiring about trains to Pune at Dadar station, this policewalla called us and started enquiring about our whereabouts. He checked our id's,our luggage and even our cell phones. When he couldn't find anything against us , he bore an irritated look on his face and asked us to get lost.
Thanking our stars that we weren't carrying any alcohol, we found the first way out of that place,took a bus and left for pune.Only thing that added to our misery was the delay in reaching pune cuz the tyre of our bus punctured and they took an hour to replace it.Still i am safely back home and 2 beers down as i post this blog. All in all it was a great learning experience and 3 cheers to pune.It is indeed the city to live in..:-)

RUDE....awakening

2008-02-17T09:13:00.000-08:00

Rudely Dudley Cudley Fiddly Mudley smugly............oh hi u r here....
I was preparing for my exam thats why am practicing adverbs.Anyways now that we are here let's share some thoughts....Random ones to say the least..
Well i am very rude,that's the opinion of a friend of mine.Should i think about it??
Even if i am rude why should it be of any concern to anyone??Why should i even give a f%#@ about it?? But as one of my best friends put it,i am not like that i do give a f%@# about what others think about me,why is a friend pissed with me or why is someone avoiding me??Huh...i sound pretty stupid in here,still....Now i am apparating away to some happy thoughts...Wanna come along??Why not mate?come on it will be fun..you'll enjoy it....
........knock knock knocking on the heaven's door.......Do you recognize the place? its some auditorium. And do u recognize the band?..Well its my band.And the bassist that you see up there...that's me.This was my first ever stage performance and my proudest moment of college life.This performance is dedicated to all the promises that have been kept,in spite of all the hurdles...You know i had promised 2 of my best friends exactly one year ago that i would be performing on that stage in an year's time.I kept my my promise.
I have to go to Bombay tomorrow as i have an exam so see you in two days time.Meanwhile,would you keep your promise and come back to check whats new on my mind?:-)

Valentine's Day Special

2008-02-14T06:20:00.000-08:00

Heeehooohaaahaaahaah.......
Where am i???What are those sounds???I cant see any light???What is this place???
God i am scared....HELP!!!!!!!!!!
.....buzzzzzz....buzzzzz...If u wanna get down u gotta take her out..Cocaine...
WOOH i was dreaming.thanks to Mr.Clapton whose track is my ring tone i got up just before the devil could eat me up.Without thinking too much about my dream i wake up to valentine's day and start preparing for a very busy day at college.It is the second day of my college fest and today's the final of my event.
Event went well in spite of some major bottlenecks leaving me free to kill time watching other events and practicing for my big night tomorrow when i give my first ever stage performance as a guitarist.Evening went into preparing for my flatmate's birthday bash and later i went to a very cool place for dinner.
Food,drinks and ambiance everything was awesome.Had a great time and drove back at a crazy speed to be there for my friend's birthday.After ceremonial cake cutting and birthday bumps we started drinking.After downing a couple of beers here i am blogging to the world my valentine's day.I have to say my day was awesome,still i can feel the void which can only be filled by an angel who ll make my heart sing...again :)

Destiny's Child

2008-02-11T07:23:00.000-08:00

8th February,2008 will remain etched in my memory for a long time to come.It was a day that showed both sides of the coin to me .i.e. ecstasy and pain.
Morning started with cold wave whipping across my face,sending the chill to the innermost cell of my bone.An hour later i was sitting in the assembly hall of SCIT with a lot of nervous faces sitting around me waiting for their turn to participate in Group Discussions.Doubts and fear started taking control of me.I didn't know if i was shivering because of cold or it was just nervousness showing its effects...
Any doubts i had regarding my GD evaporated as soon as i started speaking and i knew at that moment i was gonna ace it.As if my new found confidence was not enough,i got a call from someone informing me that i had been selected as a bassist for host performance in my college fest.This acted as a booster and i knew it then and there that come what may,i was going to get through.My interviews went quite good.
Later,while going to my college for band practice i got caught up in traffic for an hour. The frustration of traffic freaked me out so much that i met with an accident.This did act as a dampener and proved the fact that pain keeps us humble.Far away in the horizon sun was setting,taking away the light from my eyes but promising to be back with new hope and opportunities topped with problems in equal measure in 12 hours time.

The disaster called soccer

2008-02-03T05:08:00.000-08:00

Sorry for not posting for a long time.Been busy off late what with so many exams all over me.
My results have been pretty decent,still the future remains quite uncertain.This rat race is taking a toll on my creativity.Otherwise also,things haven't been great for me especially after the new years.I got my first backlog in college life,one of my closest friends stopped talking to me, projects got delayed etc.To sum it all up things haven't progressed the way i wanted them to in the new years.My new years resolution was to quit smoking up,but all these incidents have pushed me towards Hash all over again.
Today there was my intra-college soccer competition and we lost 9-0.I just can't help but realize that i am losing everything right now.How can i let go if there isn't any security????I am completely lost today.To the world i am normal and happy right now,but inside i am lonely,sad and hoping for someone to take me out of this shell of darkness while trying myself to find the path to happyness with a y....

eh.......U did it again

2008-01-26T05:17:00.000-08:00

"To err is human, but to commit the same mistake time and again isn't.You believe that you are right and don't listen to anything i say but is that gonna help you in anyway.I am all but a passing milestone in your life.I ll pass into archives sooner or later,but where will you go carrying the emotional burden which has already ruined your youth
and the danger of you losing yourself looms large."

Note- I haven't completed this one but will do so soon.This post is inspired by a dream and some reality.Thanks

You have brains...Think...

2007-12-30T12:37:00.000-08:00

Sometimes i feel we are living in a political matrix where the word "freedom" is being used by the people in power just as an escape character is used by the software programmers.A very strange comparision you would say,but on a closer look you'll understand the relevance.
Have you seen the movie "Fight Club"(its the hollywood one starring Brad Pitt.do not mistake it with the bollywood flick).If you have seen the movie then you would relate to my article much better.I have been inspired by the movie to such an extent that i keep comparing things that "tyler durden" says in the movie and have become a big fan of his ideology except for the blowing up of the cities and the vandalism part.
We live in a system that to say the least is pretty unsystematic.What does one do about it???There are three diffrent possibilities.One is to stay passive and accept the system as it is.Second is to accept the system and take control by coming in the position of power.Or would you choose the third and the most radical one that is to destroy everything related to the system.But can you really destroy the system without destroying yourself.Remember what the programmer of the source told neo in matrix reloaded,"If you destroy the source of the matrix then you ll die as well."
Lets analyze our options.The first option is the one that you would normally associate with the weak,powerless and those who just like to comment over the state of things without doing anything about it.The second option is taken by those power hungry citizens of the society who feed on power and believe in their supremacy over others.Third and final option labels you as an anarchist,terrorist or a naxalite.
Now what does a good concerned citizen do???Suicide.....i am just kidding.But on a serious note, isnt there any good way to overcome all the deficiencies of our system and bring about order?Can we ever successfuly create a state of equilibrium in our system???
In the heights of human depression the general feeling is the one of despair and hopelessness frequently punctuated by bouts of violence and a overwhelming feeling or need to destroy something,anything and everything.Have you ever been depressed?Have you ever cultivated the idea that god doesn't love you?That you are god's unwanted children and god doesn't need you?Well so be it you don't need god either.
There's this scientist whose name i can't remember.He came up with this theory called...........well i dont remember that also(seems i am suffering from short term memory loss..hehehe).Whatever the name be its the content thats important.According to this unnamed one,"When the nuclear fission is done in a controlled medium it might expand and create other nuclei and atoms.This can over a period of time create matter the size of the universe.It can evolve and have a solar system and civilization like ours as well."So is it possible that our universe was indeed created in a chemistry lab.If so do the creators have any control over us.How will it look if an eccentric looking scientist comes to you and says i am your creator dude stop worshipping your god.In all probability you ll feel that guy is mad.Still,this is a theory and unless it is proved right we can continue with the religions.On the contrary unless it is proved wrong we cannot discard it either.So.....now god's existence is in doubt.Now,does it really concern us whether god loves us or for that matter anyone loves us?The answer is a big "NO".
We are who we are because we exist and that,dear reader is the biggest truth.Our existence in fact is the only truth,everything else has got two sides to it,one positive and the other negative.Are you with me on this???If not then here goes the examples,instances or illustrations,classify as you wish.
-A man loves a woman to have sex,while a woman has sex to get love.(I hav read about this theory,it isnt true in every case but majority wins.I dont necessarily believe in this theory!!)
-There is an illiterate beggar who is very intelligent(intelligence my dear has nothing to do with knowledge),would you go and make him your friend?We make friends who are our colleagues,neighbours or someone in the same social circle.
-We make friends for companionship,while those who prefer to go alone are branded as psychos or loners.
Think about every relationship and you ll find the two sides all over.Those which you never knew existed or you concsiously ignored .Whatever may be the reason you need to realise that you are all alone in this world,one independent being and your existence being the only real truth.Once you accept it you won't feel miserable,in fact this awakening shall give you a new level of freedom.This realisation makes sure you shun all the existing baggage of shame,depression and loneliness.
Did you ever think about death?Is it good or bad?Death comes to every one someday...We keep inching towards it every moment of our lives.In a broad sense you might say we are dying every second from the moment that we are born.All of us have ambitions.Do you realise that you might actually die without achieving what you wanted to?How would you then feel about your life then?If you are a normal human being you would be bitterly disappointed about it.Whenever we fail we want another chance to redeem ourselves.All that is okay as long as we are concerned with just college/school exams(here we have a system of backlogs),but life rarely gives you any easy chances.No free buffet here.I guess i have deviated a bit from the topic,but that was merely to educate you about my ideology.
There are people out there who keep telling you what you should and what you shouldn't do.Government says pay taxes on time,mom says stay away from bad girls/boys,dad says don't play computer games much,Girlfriend says don't talk to your former best friend cuz she does'nt like him/her,religious leader says fight for your religion your faith is in danger etc etc.See there are so many voices all around you that your original reality has gone into hibernate mode.You need to lose all these voices first.Unless you lose everything you cannot bring your reality into focus and you definitely cannot gain anything.
Why should we pay taxes when all we get is dirty cities,roads that better suit a paddy field,water and food that is being reported as containing poison.In the end we pay taxes for civil purposes.When did we last hear a government official/minister paying highest taxes in a city.Its usually a common man from among us who has achieved excellence in their fields of work and have enough money now,so they dutifully pay the tax.These hypocrites can't save their own children from a bunch of inspired mercenaries and they promise us of safety.Till when can we believe in all this bullshit?
Parents till this date are the only well wishers of ours who unconditionally support and love us.Even this front seems to be diluting now that we hear reports of a father giving his 3 year old child whiskey to drink whenever the child cries and is really proud of this fact.Girlfriends are usually temporary they'll say what suits their interest and same implies to boyfriends as well.
Religious leaders are the biggest hypocrites of all.Their sole motive is to divide and rule.In the present world order where knowledge and wealth are fast becoming a human being's god where is the time to fight another person on the basis of religion.Do we even need the religious rules that are centuries old?Dont we update every product,rule,technology,laws,machines,constitutions over a span of time???When was the last time that a religion was updated.Why treat religion on a separate ground???In the end every religion is a human idea and export.So just like every idea dont you feel religions need to be modernized as well.Who is a certain Arab to take decisions on behalf of rest of the Islamic world??Why should we listen to a priest from ,god knows where, in terms of what we need to wear,eat and speak??
I recently read an article concerning promotion of Hindi and regional languages over english.Yes its a good thing to promote your culture but hang on why do you want to remove english from our school syllabus???Dont these politicians know that all this BPO boom in India is only because we are proficient in english?Do they not know that all over the country the medium of instruction in higher education is english.
These so called leaders are just pushing us into stone age where iliteracy is the norm and neighbours fight each other over minor issues.So dear reader its time we start reasoning as our only hope is intrinsic human qualities like reasoning and love that can save the system from a crash.Not one,not 2 but the whole system needs to change only then can a state of stable equilibrium be achieved.
In the hindsight i feel even if the society as a whole brings about a certain degree of moral flexibility it still wont be enough to achieve equilibrium.You see the whole world has been so inspired by the great american dream that they have all taken to blatant useless consumerism.If there is any new product or if our neighbour buys something flashy we feel "I gotta hav that."While the media tries to make you believe that we are doing great as a society and a country,on closer examination you'll feel that you are being misled.The whole hype surrounding retail boom and better standard of living for the middle class is man made.They say theres a boom to create boom.Modern day media (print or electronic) are nothing but the messiahs of the capitalists.We have grown so used to being directed about what to do that we let the news guys make all our decisions. When media says economic indicators are good the share market goes into bullish mode and when these news channels broadcast about some new policy made by the governing body (however good it maybe for the market) and the media says its the death bell for the market,theres always a bloodbath as the market loses trillions of cash in the intra day trading.Well is there any loss?if yes then who loses?are the brokers so stupid to lose so much money?No the brokers aren't stupid cuz they dont lose anything,its general public like you and me who are small investors who lose our hard-earned money.
We buy a laptop today.Tomorrow intel comes up with a brand new technology.Even though your laptop serves the purpose you feel its outdated and want to buy a new laptop.This kind of consumerism increases the demand and ultimately a common man is the one who loses.In the developmental phase of every economy, the real estates prices drive the inflation.And brokers drive this growth.As the demand for good flats and premium office space has gone beyond the supplies it has created a sitution that closely resembles the one of monopolistic competition with brokers acting as sellers and customers losing big time.We shall not blame any government or administration for inflation,its all because of us.We have created this situation where we are the ones who are losing.
Many people say earning a lot of money is of no use.I say be in that position and only then shall you comment on this.Cutting the long story short,the only way in which we can bring about equilibrium in the society is by individual well being.Every individual must try and attain the highest power they can.99% people who read this passsage will forget everything tomorrow,while 1% will try and make a valid effort to change things around.My dear reader its the power of one that can change the system.You have the power,all you need to do is start pulling the strings of your life yourself rather letting anyone else do it.Best of luck.
---Sid

note-If you like what i have written and wanna discuss then you can mail me on "sidvibhu@gmail.com" else don't bother.bye

Hello World!!

2007-12-24T00:55:00.000-08:00

Hello bloggers I am Sid a student and part time web designer/programmer from pune,India. I am making a comeback to blogosphere after a long break. I write for the people and do care for what others think of it so please keep those comments and suggestions coming cuz thats what keeps a writer goin.Anyways i ll start blogging tomorrow.I ll make sure that i dont use any sms type language in my blogs and i hope you ll forgive me for taking the liberty of using such texts in my intro blog.

p.s. I have titled this one "Hello World" cuz i am a software programmer and all my first programs on any new platform is Hello World!!